Human beings go through a varied range of emotions through the course of their lives, and sometimes, dealing with these emotions can cause us to feel down in a number of ways. Besides emotions, humans also have a need to experience emotion from others around them, especially when it comes to feelings of love, friendship, and kindness. For some, getting these emotional reactions from those around them is an incredibly easy task and something that they don’t have to ponder over too much. For others, getting this kind of emotional reciprocation is not always easy, bringing them to a state wherein they have to battle their longing for these emotions.
Often, those who are in need of certain reciprocity and love from people around them have a hard time setting personal boundaries as a whole. For example, let’s say a man has a few concerns with people’s opinions of him. He has a few friends around him to do their part of supporting him, which also acts as a double-edged sword. On the one hand, he is incredibly happy to have people who care and love him, but at the same time, keeping up with their expectations can be hard. His friends decide to call him out for drinks, but he has had an incredibly tiring day at work. However, instead of saying no and getting some rest, he decides to actually go in for it, simply because he doesn’t want to hurt their feelings or have them see him in a negative light in any way.
The outcome of this scenario could also be because of the guilt that the man is facing. Often, we are put into solutions where we feel like we would let our friends and family down if we don’t meet with them or do something that they want. This then puts a significant amount of pressure on the individual, causing them to start bottling up their emotions. In the end, the pile-up has a dwindling effect on the person’s emotional state, causing stress, anxiety, and even depression.
Stepping Down from Being A People Pleaser
Being someone who gels with almost every kind of person and who pleases everyone in sight is exhausting and can start to take a toll on an individual rather quickly. People who fall into this category often feel like the happiness of others is dependent on them, and it is their job to make them feel better. However, doing this results in the suppression of one’s own needs. People pleasers are often so engrossed in making others happy that they forget to take care of themselves and their own needs.
While being a people pleaser is not inherently bad, it can have a negative effect on one’s life in the long run. For a lot of individuals, this is something that has been ingrained into their personality, and which they have been emulating since a young age. Changing this mentality takes time, and generally requires the support of those around you.
Therapy has always been one of the best courses of action to take for those who want to be able to focus on themselves and their well being. A well-trained therapist can help you get to the root cause of your issues and can help you alter your behavior in a way that makes you your main priority.
Talkspace has emerged as one of the most prominent platforms for those who are on the lookout for good therapists who are well trained, and who have worked with a wide range of patients in the past. With the help of Talkspace, individuals all over the world have managed to regain control of their own lives, and have found a way to focus on themselves and their own benefit.